#4

Back but Still There

There was nothing but still I kept thinking it’s time to get up so I forced my eyes open.

It was dark. I could hear the fan snoring as if with each turn of the three blades it was going somewhere deep within its own dream world. I must have been sweating during the night because my Anpanman pajamas were ready to swim off my clammy skin and I was in dire need of a shot of Fireball corn whiskey.
I reached over to the small but suitable night table to where I always left my shot glass before passing out. As my fingers touched the glass I felt something touch my leg. I jolted off the bed pulling the legs of the table out from under itself. I fell awkwardly and with a snap and a crack the now broken shot glass lodged itself between ribs number six and seven.
“What are you doing?” I heard someone asking.
“Giving my ribs a drink,” I said...now bleeding profusely into the spilled corn whiskey.
The light bulb on the ceiling sizzled twice and then burnt out. I had just enough time to see that standing next to the light switch was Powder.
“What are you doing here?” I asked.
“I didn’t want your chowder, just your money...not like Clops,” she said.
“Oh ya...but where am I?” Knowing dam well that this was my room but not knowing how I got here.

Usually ones eyes adapt to the darkness but there were only spooky floaters floating before my eyes.

“Powder, there’s a flashlight under the pillow, could you turn it on?”

I heard the rustle of a pillow and then voilà. She shone the beam on me and gasped. Then I gasped and quickly dislodged the broken shot glass from the right side of my wounded torso. Powder quickly grabbed a handful of used tissues and a pair of handcuffs.

She winked while saying, ”Just kidding,” and threw them back on the bed.

She placed the tissues over my wound and rushed off to the medicine cabinet inside the bathroom.

“This tape bandage should hold it together,” she said.

When she came back she picked up the broken pieces of glass and began to tape it back together.

“What about me?”

Presumptuously thinking the shot glass wasn’t as important as me.

“You’ll be okay... you look shocked. Don’t worry I have one here for you, too.” She neatly wrapped the shot glass back together and started on me, stopping only for a moment to fill the bandaged glass with whiskey.

”Here you are,” she smiled as the whiskey dribbled out from beneath the bandage.

I chugged it back, let out a deep heated guttural growl and said, “Thanks!... How did I get here?” Knowing she had a good idea what the answer was.

“It’s a long uninteresting story so I’ll keep it short. Clops and I found you just down the street from the Slixx all huddled up in Gino Valentinos flower bed. We called Dr. Doesit and had him examine you. He said you weren’t feeling well...possibly a heart attack, gave us some pills and told us to keep you in bed for a couple of days. And here you are, fit as a fiddle...almost.”

“You mean I’ve been medicated?” I asked.

“No, no, he gave them to Clops and I...they’re really good.”

“What about my heart?”

“You’ve been sleeping for several days now and you’re still here, aren’t you?”

“... So you wanted more than my chowder...did you find my stash?” I commented.

“If I had, I wouldn’t be here now, I’d be over at Gino’s place celebrating with the OLK, she said.

“You mean the OLK is real?”

“If it wasn’t we wouldn’t be here now,” she said.

”Shit!!! How do I get out of here?”

“I can show you for a small fee...your stash,” she said.

I’d gladly give her my stash if I could believe her but right now she could be just numbers and letters in the program.

Stash...I thought trying to remember where it was and was it just money or possibly something of importance.